Gin and Juice: Mind on My Money

By ‘Maverick’

And on the 7^th day god rested. He ordered a beer and proceeded to get a Red bull and Vodka, was promptly overcharged and told to move away from the bar. So much for gratitude I guess.

Let’s set the scene shall we. Wollongong is the 3d largest city in NSW…… ok lets not. Lets just say it took about an hours drive from point A(Being where I live) to point B(Being the Gong). So my ultimate fear was that I had just spent about $25 in fuel to be bitterly disappointed by what The Glasshouse had to offer me. I wont lie, I had previously been to a few nights in Wollongong on a Wednesday for uni night and I must say although good times were had wasn’t all that impressed. Best served in large groups I say. However that’s not how it all went down.

We arrived to the Glassy at around about 10:30pm. Were quickly ushered to the line where a burly man with his chest hairs pointed in my face carded us. I gave him the appropriate “Thanks mate” as I walked through the non apparent doors into what seemed like a beer garden that had been set on fire. Being a non smoker I decided this was not the place for me and quickly ran inside only to be confronted by a blistering wall of sweaty people dancing all over the place. Before I go any further a quick thumbs up is in order to the Blonde girl who danced as if she was trying to make the top 10 in “So you think you can dance”. Overall, the amount of people in the pub/bar was simply impressive. Thumbs up.

The next logical step was to of course head toward the bar. Being Mr Deso Dave my first choice was that of an Alcoholic beverage. (Genius I know) I ordered a Pure Blonde and received a Red bull with Vodka. Here’s a tip, have some brews before you go, lie to the bouncer, and you might just save yourself a mint. For some reason management seem to believe that the Glasshouse is the new Trademark Hotel. The only thing the bar had going for it was the obvious Ralph Model bikini model contestants serving the drinks (This explains the wrong order at least. You go girl).

Thumb ‘Sideways’

The people seemed to be rather friendly and it was obviously a rather laid back environment as Shorts were not only accepted but they were encouraged. As the temperature rose by about 20 degrees upon going inside. There were various hens nights going on around us and I was asked if I had any Condoms. Not knowing what she wanted from me I replied that ‘condoms were for sailors’. She took a sip from her penis shaped straw, rolled her eyes and went on about her business. The dance floor was where all the fun was to be had; Goose did his natural chicken like mating ritual dance that seemed to work as the night went on and was propositioned by many young horny ladies.

Thumbs up

The venue was nice, the music loud and the booze was flowing like water. It all melded together nicely. There was actually a nightclub within the bar itself. We opted not to check it out as the detailed journalists we long to be as too much fun was being had downstairs. Not to mention many people I had seen pay their money to go inside the nightclub portion ended up back down anyway. Good choice I say.

Thumbs up.

So to say that I had an enjoyable night would be a good indication of the quality of The Glasshouse. I was neither getting drunk, nor was in any special mood. It was a plain old Saturday night and I left feeling happy I had gone down. Overall I will give The Glasshouse a 3 ¾ Stars out of 5.